Aiden Lake

I was the kid who grew up in the church, my mom went every Sunday, and I was baptized young, new some scripture, where the books were, ect.
But about two years ago, I was crazy deep in depression. I was rapidly losing hope and doing anything to give myself life. I had changed my lifestyle completely and had strayed away from God. It was the month of July and I was going to camp with my two brothers. Now I knew the routine, set the example, try to get something out of it, show to my parents I was changed and then fall right out of it after the week is done. So when I went to camp I was determined to lift my brother to Christ even it meant pushing myself farther away.
Now typically camp lasts a week, and they put 6-8 kids in a cabin. It was me, my two brothers, and Kam, Grady , and Louie. Now right away at camp they have you fill out a questionnaire about what you are struggling with and ect ect. Now I wrote down nothing, I was kinda determined not to let anyone see. But our cabin leader, Mark. Could see right through me, he told me that my pains were not hidden and that I was put purposely in this cabin to show that I haven’t been left and that I’m not alone.
That night, we were called to the chapel. And I was told to write our shames on a piece of paper, I had to look myself in the mirror and ask “what’s wrong with me” so for the first time I acknowledged that I had depression and that I was rapidly losing hope. With that realization I came to another. I was hurt. And I was holding a grudge against God, how could he leave me like that? All alone. How could he sit there and let me live the way I was living.
Now that whole next day I sat there and thought about that question, I’m not really the type to let stuff go. But that night, as I was leaving the chapel, someone(a worker in the kitchen) ran up to the microphone and started saying things.
“Stop! You’re about to walk out that door. Is it really worth it? Why do you keep living the way you are? You’ve prayed and you think that you felt god? You haven’t felt nothing. You keep shutting the door on Christ over and over again. And he keeps trying to get to you but you aren’t letting him. Stop and pray. Ask him what u need to do.”
Now I started thinking, you know that kinda sounds like me. But oh well I’ll keep walking. Bro I was so hungry I wanted a pizza okay, and I had a slice waiting for me.
Then she kept talking and it struck me like a lightning bolt going straight down the middle of me.
 “Aiden Lake, he has called you by name. You’re not alone”
Now.. I had never experienced anything like that so I frozen, my mind was racing. I felt like I had just been hit by a train. The only thing I could think about was how, he left me. And now he is calling me out in a room full of campers, strangers I didn’t know. The embarrassment of that.. but he called me out, left the ninety-nine. And found his missing one.
I remember falling to my knees, praying desperately. Over and over again, screaming internally, “WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME?!” Over and over and over again. My mind was racing, my heart felt like it was gonna explode out of my chest, it was getting hard to breathe. And then in the midst of the hurricane. The winds stopped. And the waves chilled. Slowly rolling in to the beach. I didn’t feel like I was drowning anymore. Like everything had been lifted away. And the softest voice, calm, gentle, the most perfect voice I’ve ever heard, spoke.
“I never left”
So the next day, I was praying, and I had this feeling that I just needed to go tell my cabin mate  “that even thought your going through a storm God will give you peace and you are not alone, because I’m going through the same thing. And God is not scared to leave the 99 to find his 1 lost sheep.” We then were left praying together and as we were praying, I felt somone putting their hand on me. And declaring “in the name of Jesus Christ, your depression is no more.” I could feel the depression being broken chain by chain. I was free. I was found and I was free.
That last night, I was praying to see what I needed to do to get me closer to him. And he told me four steps.
1) stop controlling everything and just let Him lead me.
2) give Him my full dedication.
3) start reading my Bible and praying.
4) lose all friends who were leading you astray.
So I did. I went home, and in one messing swing got rid of all my friends. Started over, and started living my life for God completely, no questions asked. Since that summer, my life has been devoted to God. My life has been transformed completely. He is a chain breaker and a miracle worker.

There is one thing I would like to say, don’t let your life get to that point. Don’t be a Saul. Don’t have to be blinded so you can see again. Start now, live for God. Don’t make him call you out, because he will.